“To make the change to save women, we need to help men.
“And that’s not in a nasty way – it’s just if we can get all on the same path, there will be no deaths.
“Respect is a big, big powerful word.”
Ms O’Brien was brutally bashed with a baseball bat by a former partner in Brisbane in 2012, after emotional and psychological abuse escalated.
In her own words, the attack was ‘at the hands of a perpetrator who would not take ‘no’ for an answer’, and caused lifelong injuries such as losing eyesight on her right side, her sense of smell, and her skull being held together with screws and titanium plates.
She still travels to Brisbane every seven-10 days to be treated by her original medical team of specialists.
“After 52 operations, I’ve still got two more to go – one, they’re pushing out as long as I can, which is a whole jaw reconstruction that I’m not looking forward to,” she said.
“The dead eye is actually still behind my prosthetic eye, and it’s a one-in-70,000 chance that it could cause a disease and make me blind in the other eye, so that’s more just precautionary.”
Ms O’Brien said she was ‘virtually a prisoner’ in her own body for the rest of her life, but she was determined to tackle her treatment in a positive way.
“I say ‘I’m going up for my grease and oil change’ – I want either sex who’s going through it and recovering to look at the positives and don’t wake up and wish you’d done this, this and this,” she said.
“It’s something I’ve done the whole journey with the doctors and nurses, so my mindset is in such a good space.
“ I know I look different, but my messaging is to learn to love yourself.
“I now do love myself – not in a selfish way, but just having to put myself first to recover and move forward.”
Ms O’Brien certainly hasn’t been selfish in sharing her story – an experience she has used to help other people dealing with family violence.
“ I’ve never been a speaker, never at school, never at all. I think I’m just speaking from the heart, just being open and honest, and letting people know that they’re not alone,” she said.
As a public speaker, she talks to all ages, genders and those from all walks of life about how family violence can start and warns of the ‘red flags’ that people should look out for.
“ It could be something as simple as a partner saying ‘you’re not allowed to wear that today’, ‘you can’t have your hair like that or let’s change the color of your hair,” she said.
“Or I’ll drop you off and I’ll be back in 30 minutes to pick you up from doing the groceries and you’ve only got $50 to do the groceries.
“It’s all these little things – any little red flag is a big red flag. Run by your gut feeling – it’s always right.”
Ms O’Brien works with many workplaces, organisations – including AFL clubs – and schools in a space that she admits she knew little about before being a victim.
She is passionate about the family violence discussion and preventative work being a part of the school curriculum.
“Working with young men, as young as five, that’s where we need to change mindsets to make a change moving forward,” she said.
Ms O’Brien said the responses and reactions she saw in school students often reflected what was happening in their home life.
“People would be blown away if they heard the stories of young people, and what is happening in that world,” she said.
“ A lot of it is repeat behaviour –they’re watching what their parents are doing, thinking it’s okay to call mum a bitch or things like that. The next generation thinks that is funny.”
Ms O’Brien said working with perpetrators who have been to jail for family violence crimes was also an effective tool in getting through to teenagers.
“I never thought I’d be able to work with perpetrators, but it’s something I do enjoy because I make them own it,” she said.
“They’re going into schools now and doing what I’m doing to change mindsets.
“We need both sexes. We need to work on this crisis together. And we are still in a crisis.”
Ms O’Brien said while she travelled Australia to work in the family violence space, being a part of WCAFV was important to help the high rates of family violence in the Wimmera.
“Being a local person myself, and with domestic violence being so rife – the crisis we’re in – if I can help one person in our area, whether they’re old or young, that’s why I will always love being a part of Shine the Light in Horsham,” she said.
“ Please remember any little red flag is a big red flag and you’re not alone in this space.
“There’s help there, and please reach out to anyone and ask.”
For event updates, including the possibility of a shuttle bus between Sawyer Park and Ward Street, people can check the Wimmera Committee Against Family Violence’s Facebook page.
The entire April 29, 2026 edition of The Weekly Advertiser is available online. READ IT HERE!
The entire April 29, 2026 edition of AgLife is available online. READ IT HERE!
